300: Rise of an Empire (2014)

Year: 2014
Running Time: 102 minutes
Director: Noam Murro
Writers: Frank Miller (graphic novel "Xerxes"), Zack Snyder and Kurt Johnstad (screenplay)
Cast: Sullivan Stapleton, Eva Green, Rodrigo Santoro, Lena Headey, Hans Matheson, David Wenham, Callan Mulvey, Jack O'Connell

300: Rise of an Empire is a perfect follow up to 2006's 300. It sits somewhere in between prequel and sequel and provides an interesting look at the legendary figures of ancient Greece and Persia. Even though it is not historically accurate, the large majority of people will go to see this film for the incredible CGI that doesn't disappoint rather than for a history lesson. 300: Rise of an Empire is far more about the battles scenes and infamous blood thirst than the story and this what has to be remembered going into the film.

Based on the graphic novel, "Xerxes" by Frank Miller, we see Persian royalty, Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro) go from being man to God upon the death of his father, King Darius (Igal Naor). While Xerxes believes that he is in charge, he is under the manipulation of Athens born, but Persian raised and navy commander, Artemisia (Eva Green). Persia sets their sights first on Athens and it's army led by Themistocles (Sullivan Stapleton) in Xerxes plan for domination. Athens calls upon their rivals Sparta to take on Persia's army as it is the only way they can match the numbers in their navy.

300: Rise of an Empire is in itself both a prequel and sequel to 300 as it starts before 300 Spartans go into battle and continues through the aftermath of their infamous battle. The film is based more on Frank Miller's graphic novel than history itself so there are a number of historical inaccuracies through the film. For example, Themistocles and Xerxes were never at the battle in which Darius was killed so Themistocles was obviously not Darius' killer. The title of the film is also a spot of confusion in itself because it does not clarify which empire is on the rise and the empires in the film had already risen before the film begins. However, because this film is based on the graphic novel rather than history, the inaccuracies can be forgiven and people should remember this before going into the film and being disappointed in screenwriters Zack Snyder (who was the director of 300) and Kurt Johnstad for their lack of research.

The screenplay itself is not a particularly strong one as the battle scenes play the largest part in the film. The story is almost the backdrop for the battle. The first half of the film is more interesting from a narrative point of view, while in the second half the story is lost under the weight of battle. However, there are some particularly powerful moments of dialogue spoken by Themistocles and the Athenians. Of course some of the dialogue can be quite corny, as heroic dialogue in battle does tend to be.

Yet, as it was said before, the main reason people will go to see 300: Rise of an Empire is to behold its incredibly lifelike ancient battle scenes created by some spectacular CGI. The ancient world is amazingly recreated and so realistic that you forget the actors are standing up against a green screen and are not on the streets of Sparta, Persia or the high seas. The scenes set on the Aegean Sea are particularly spectacular. Watching the film in 3D makes the film even more spectacular, if not more gruesome. Like the original 300, this follow up is incredibly graphic and violent. This film is absolutely not for anyone who gets queasy from the sight of blood, as there is a lot of it being splattered in every direction. The 3D makes this splattering a bit more of an event and is used as water would be used in a 3D version of Free Willy (if there was such a thing).

Sullivan Stapleton does well in the lead as Themistocles. His character does not show much development through the film and there is not much of a back story to him (although he does confess that there really is no back story to him besides growing up in combat), but he gives a good performance and is actually very likable. While Stapleton is the lead and has little background story, the exact opposite can be said for Eva Green's Artemisia. It is debatable whether it is Sullivan or Green in the lead in 300: Rise of an Empire. A great deal of emphasis is based on Artemisia's background and the film is as much about her as it is about the battle itself. Green does do well as the leading action lady, as she is extremely manipulative and it is obvious it is her in charge and not Xerxes (another historical inaccuracy, but forgiven as it makes great entertainment). She makes for interesting viewing and one of the best parts of the film is when she allows herself a moment of emotion when she is clearly pained by the realisation that Themistocles was the one who killed Darius.

For how terrifying Rodrigo Santoro is in the very first scene as Xerxes, you really wish you would have seen more of him throughout the film. He is made out to be evil from the very beginning, but you do not see enough of him to see this in him, although Artemisia is seen to be the evil one between the two of them. Lena Headey, who reprises her role as Queen Gorgo is good in the scenes she is in, but again you wish you could see a bit more of her throughout the film.

The most important thing to remember with 300: Rise of an Empire is that it is not a history lesson. Once this is understood, the ancient world is to be marvelled at.

6.5/10

Editor's Choice: St Trinian's (2007)

Year: 2007

Running Time: 97 minutes

Director: Oliver Parker and Barnaby Thompson

Writers: Piers Ashworth and Nick Moorcroft (screenplay), Jamie Minoprio and Jonathan M. Stern (additional material), Ronald Searle (cartoons)

Cast: Rupert Everett, Colin Firth, Gemma Arterton, Talulah Riley, Lena Headey, Russell Brand, Kathryn Drysdale, Tamsin Egerton, Paloma Faith, Juno Temple, Lily Cole, Lucy Punch, Holly Mackie, Cloe Mackie, Toby Jones, Celia Imrie, Jodie Whittaker, Mischa Barton, Stephen Fry

There is only so long you can go as a film reviewer before you feel that you absolutely must tell the world why you love one of your guilty pleasures.

St Trinian's is perhaps my biggest guilty pleasure. It is the movie I put on when I don't know what I feel like watching. It is the film I watch when I need a bit of a laugh. It is the film I watch when I want to see all these great actors in one place. It's the film I watch when I just want to have some fun and not be challenged in any way shape or form. It's may not be the best made film and it won't feature in any "Best of" lists, but this doesn't detract from the enjoyment it gives me and so many other people. Does this make St Trinian's a cult classic? It could well do. Honestly, I don't think I will ever get sick of watching this film over and over and I have no shame in saying it. Nor do I think I will ever stop quoting Tasmin Egerton's lines over and over.

Before I go into detail about why I love this film so much, here's a quick run through about St Trinian's. St Trinian's is an English boarding school for girls, but not just any girls. The naughtiest and unruly girls. By their own definition, they are the defenders of anarchy. As for the teachers, they are the teachers who can't find a job anywhere else. Headmistress Ms Camilla Fritton (played by Rupert Everett) is known to the area as the one who lets her girls run wild and do whatever they want, yet she believes she is looking after her girls who have nowhere else to go. Yet, St Trinian's is about to make some changes, starting on the day which Ms Fritton's estranged brother, Carnaby (also played by Everett) brings his bullied daughter, Annabelle (Talulah Riley) to St Trinian's. Head girl, Kelly Jones (Gemma Arterton) is on hand to welcome Annabelle and after introducing her to all the cliques, reveals that the First Year's are taking bets about how long she will last. The girls over hear a conversation between Ms Fritton and the bank manager and find out that their school is in dire straits financially and may close down. The girls take matters into their own hands and hatch an extremely elaborate plan to save their beloved school.

So why do I love St Trinian's so much? The film, based on the cartoons by Ronald Searle, opened in 2007 to mixed reviews. It has a 5.6 rating on IMDb and 31% on Rotten Tomatoes. This doesn't sound enticing at all at the moment, does it? Yet, there is so much to love about it.

When I went to the Australian premiere of Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters in January this year which Gemma Arterton, I overheard a fan say to her "You were great in St Trinian's!" and she replied, "Thankyou. It's a real girl power film".

And that it is. The audience for St Trinian's may predominantly be female for this reason. Obviously the majority of the cast is female (even Rupert Everett is playing a woman for the large part of the movie) as it is set in a girls school. Even though this is a school for bad girls, the characters maintain the image of being unruly without crossing the boundaries into them being described as crude or inappropriate. Although they speak of bombs and explosives, they are not particularly violent either. They are more just mischievous than anything else, and it is welcome for them to be so. St Trinian's is very much the English brand of comedy. If you are not a fan of British comedy, this is probably not for you, yet it is perfect for those that are. The girls antics throughout the film are very, very funny and the script is hilarious.

And the masterplan they hatch! Brilliant! It is so elaborate, colourful and fun. They combine the competing in a televised school game show with a heist in order to save their school and although it may be predictable, is just great fun to watch. The soundtrack is also extremely foot tapping and head bopping.

Yet, I think it is really the actors and their  characters who make the film. What separates St Trinians from other comedy films and particularly those with a lot of characters, like this film has, is that there is a great deal of character and character development. So let's take a look at the players who make this film what it is.

Rupert Everett

The role of Miss Fritton was played in the earlier St Trinian's films (released in 1954 and 1957) by Alastair Sim. But what must have Rupert Everett thought when hewas approached to play both a male and female in the 2007 St Trinian's? No matter what he thought or what it sounded like, it works! This isn't a case of Everett playing a man in drag either, you completely forget after awhile that Miss Fritton is actually a man! The love story between Fritton and Colin Firth's Geoffrey Thwaites is over the top, but a riot when you do remember that Fritton is a male. One of the funniest parts of the film is when Geoffrey see's her/him for the first time in years and the vision of Fritton in her bright pink running suit is accompanied by "Love Is A Many Splendored Thing" by The Four Aces. For all of you playing at home, here is a little bit of trivia courtesy of IMDb, the character of Camilla Fritton is modelled on the Duchess of Cornwall's image and mannerisms.

Colin Firth

Love Pride & Prejudice? Will love St Trininan's. The film is absolutely covered in references to Colin Firth's role as Mr Darcy Austen classic. When appearing on the hockey pitch again, his emergence is reminiscent of that of Mr Darcy appearing at the end of Pride & Prejudice. Miss Fritton's dog, who Geoffrey is the cause of it's demise, name is Mr Darcy. There are also quite a few references to another film of Firth's, The Girl With The Pearl Earring. In one scene, there is a classic line by Antonia Bernath's Chloe who when looking at the painting says "Wow, you can so see why Colin Firth wanted to shag her".

Lena Headey

While these days Lena Headey is most well known for her role as Cersei in "Game Of Thrones", we saw her play a polar opposite character in St Trinian's. Perhaps the most well behaved character of the film, Miss Dickinson is a far cry from Cersei Lannister. She is the goody-goody newest teacher of St Trinian's who is dying to see the girls take part in School Challenge. Headey has been around for a long time and is an extremely versatile actress. This film shows off her versatility in a character who is meant to be boring in behaviour compared to the others, but is still such a great character with a whole lot of character.

Russell Brand



Russell Brand plays Flash, another character who made his first appearance in the earlier St Trinian's films as played  by George Cole. Flash is the girl's crime consultant if you will. St Trinian's is essential viewing for any Russell Brand fan as the type of comedic dialogue he uses is very much his own. Brand's Flash is very much a superstar to the girls, as he is in real life. Perhaps his funniest scene in St Trinian's is his meeting with Carnaby Fritton in his art gallery when he is pretending to be an elusive and gay art dealer.

Talulah Riley

Talulah Riley is the perfect leading lady as Annabelle Fritton. She has the ability to play the bullied schoolgirl convincingly before switching to play a true St Trinian. She is a completely different character at the beginning of the film compared to at the end and that is a true example of the evolving of a character. She never stops changing throughout the film. Like Firth, Riley also provides another Pride & Prejudice reference as she played Mary Bennett in the 2005 film. Riley also appeared in the sequel, St Trinians 2 where Annabelle is named head girl.

Gemma Arterton
For the now globally famous actress, this was her breakthrough role. Gemma Arterton played head girl Kelly Jones and was absolute perfection. Many still credit this as being Arterton's best performance to date. She is undoubtedly the leader of the girls and is absolutely convincing as it. She, like Riley, has complete star power in St Trinian's.

Tamsin Egerton
Tamsin Egerton plays Chelsea, the leader of the Poshy Totty, a group of girls who run a chat line and all claim to have slept with a member of the royal family. Chelsea is believed to be the tarty airhead, but there are signs throughout the film that suggest otherwise. Egerton is wonderful in this role and is one of the most memorable characters. She delivers some of the funniest lines of the film and her final scene of School Challenge is pure gold. She is gifted with perhaps the best line of the film when she says "You want to steal...Scarlett Johansson?"

Paloma Faith
Paloma Faith plays St Trinian school girl, Andrea, who is the face of the Emo clique. Faith, who is nowadays better known as a successful UK pop/jazz singer with signature flaming red hair, is seen in a completely different light here than how we are now used to seeing her. She is also great fun to watch as she is more disturbed than actually an angry Emo chick, but also changes throughout the film to become a little less Emo in attitude.

Lily Cole
Another star who we see in a completely different light in St Trinian's than we normally see is supermodel, Lily Cole. Cole plays Polly, the leader of the Geek clique of St Trinian's. Absolutely convincing, until the scenes where you see he standing next to he co-stars and she is towering above them with her 5'10" frame.

Holly and Cloe Mackie
I love these two girls! Twin sisters who play first years, Tara and Tania are referred to by Arterton's Kelly as "Winchester's answer to The Sopranos". They are wise beyond their years, but also a whole lot of first year trouble. The girls were only ten years old when they appeared in St Trinian's and were absolutely hilarious. You know it shouldn't be adorable, but it is here when in a little ten year old voice you hear "You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!"

So, as you can see, there are dozens of reasons to love St Trinian's. I'm sure there are people out there whose personal taste will allow them the find dozens of reasons to dislike it, but everyone has their rerun guilty pleasures. Whatever film it may be, there are reasons you will always love it.

The Mortal Instruments: City Of Bones (2013)

Year: 2013
Running Time: 130 minutes
Director: Harald Zwart
Writers: Cassandra Clare (novel), Jessica Postigo (screenplay)
Cast: Lily Collins, Jamie Campbell Bower, Robert Sheehan, Kevin Zegers, Jemima West, Lena Headey, Jonathan Rhys Meyers

The Mortal Instruments: City Of Bones is now showing in cinemas everywhere.

Well, what a disappointment.

Anybody who would have read The Mortal Instruments books by Cassandra Clare will be able to confirm with you that this film is not a good representation of the first novel in the series which it is based on, City Of Bones. Not only are there so many things which are changed for the film which clearly don't work, but the screenplay is atrocious. All the potential in the world hasn't been able to save The Mortal Instruments: City Of Bones from being little more than a less than impressive and not very clean cut mash up of every young adult fantasy/romance book to screen we have seen in recent times.

Clary Fray (Lily Collins) is a seemingly ordinary New York teenager, but it soon becomes obvious that there is nothing ordinary about her when she starts to see things that her best friend, Simon (Robert Sheehan) can't see, draws strange symbols subconsciously and her mother, Jocelyn (Lena Headey) goes missing in mysterious circumstances. She meets shadowhunter, Jace (Jamie Campbell Bower) who is the first to inform her that she also has shadowhunter blood and he and his friends, Alec (Kevin Zegers) and Isabelle (Jemima West) agree to help her find her mother. Clary and Simon enter into a world they never knew existed and neither of them will ever see anything in the same way again.

For how much potential there is here, The Mortal Instruments: City Of Bones is just ordinary no matter how hard it tries to be something special. And try it does. Director, Harald Zwart is fond of trying to give scenes importance when they really don't feel as though they are by means of slow motion and the aid of a wind machine for the character's hair to create dramatic effect. The film has no feeling of importance for the large majority of it and lacks suspense tremendously.

The only thing really saving the film is the fact that Cassandra Clare's story is interesting enough and this does make the film succeed in some way as you feel as though you simply must watch the next film to find out all the answers...even if you barely tolerated the first film. While Cassandra Clare's story provides a solid basis for the film, the adapted screenplay by Jessica Postigo is it's undoing. The changes made for screen just do not work at all and the dialogue spoken by the main characters is weak and bland. Even the lines which are obviously supposed to have comedic value are just a little too predictable and just not funny at all. Zwart's direction and Postigo's writing are individually the wrong choices for the film and the mixture of the two is the reason for the film's failure. It is not strong enough a film to break through the mould and be seen as just another teen supernatural flick.

Visually, The Mortal Instruments: City Of Bones is not a complete failure. Some of the CGI does not seem completely realistic, such as when Isabelle pulls down the chandelier in the vampire attack scene, but for the most part it is convincing. As previously stated, it does try to enhance the atmosphere and emotion of it's scenes using particular filming techniques and musical scores. Perhaps the scene that does benefit from this the most is again the vampire attack when because of it's editing and entertaining battle choreography. However, for the most part, many of these scenes just feel overdone with the aid of it's cinematography. Yet, sometimes it does pose as a reminder that the scene MAY be important, but more often than not still doesn't achieve this and the scene still doesn't feel special.

The Mortal Instruments has assembled a fine cast for the beginning of it's series of films (if it does make it past the second film, as only the second film has been announced). It is just a shame that they really have not been given much for them to exhibit their talents. Lily Collins' Clary Fray is very different from the one in the books, who is quite a strong female character. The way she has been written for the film is not that. Collins' does well enough with the role that is given to her and she is likable, but hasn't got enough character to make her relatable. Jamie Campbell Bower is indeed charismatic and very well suited to the role, but it is a role that doesn't have a great deal of emotional range. Collins and Bower do have on screen chemistry, which is a saving grace for the film.

Jonathan Rhys Meyers does not have much screen time and his character isn't written very well, but his performance is still quite chilling and he does evil very well. Lena Headey also doesn't have a great deal of screen time, but does do well with what is given to her.

It is such a shame to see a film with so much potential fall dramatically short of what it could really be. The scariest thing about this supernatural film, is that no matter how unfortunate the film is, you are still interested to see the next one to find out exactly what happens to Clary and Jace.

4/10


You may have also seen Lily Collins in....
The Blind Side as Collins

You may have also seen Jamie Campbell Bower in.....
Anonymous as Young Edward De Vere/ Earl of Oxford